Candy’s Classy Breakup Tips For Moving On FAST! ❤️
The terrifying thing about starting a relationship is imagining its ending. And unfortunately (or fortunately depending on the situation) most relationship don’t last. Sometimes you don’t see the ending coming. One day things are great and then the two of you are fighting over something trivial and the relationship ends.
In the past, the end of a relationship put me in a depressed state. I would eat unhealthy comfort foods, agonize for hours with my girlfriends over what went wrong and troll his social media pages looking for clues on what he was up to and who was my replacement.
Was the new girlfriend thinner, taller, richer, more successful or prettier than me? Were they going out before we broke up? These questions haunted me. I would go through my unhealthy cycle (see the paragraph above) again.
These unhealthy activities left me in a depressed state for too long. I got tired of being so happy that the mere mention of his name would upset me. I was looking at it all wrong. Instead of agonizing that my relationship had ended I realized I should be happy that it happened. I have learned something new about myself when the relationship ended. Many times the breakup was a blessing.
Nelson Mandela famously said “I never lose. I either win or learn.”
This epiphany didn’t come to me overnight. After hearing the words, “Let’s be friends,” too many times to count I have become more comfortable with myself. The end of a relationship is often the start of something better.
Candy’s Classy Breakup Tip #1: Grieve But Move On
I allow myself to grieve when a relationship ends because it is a loss. I grieve for a short time (usually over a weekend where I can rehash with my girls and shop) and move on. The release of emotions is healthy but staying in the grieving process for weeks isn’t healthy. I tend to glamorize a relationship when it ends and not look at it objectively when I am grieving. This is why I like to have a short grieving period. Everyone has to determine the timeframe for this grieving period.
Candy’s Classy Breakup Tip #2: Hang Out With Friends
I love my friends because they support me and help me stay positive. Everyone needs a ride or die who will listen, drag them to newest hotspot or help them eat a fattening snack without judgement. I even have male friends I can talk to and I value they input especially after a breakup. It is important to have male and female friends to get different perspectives.
Candy’s Classy Breakup Tip #3: Limit the Complaining
In the beginning I suggest venting to a few close friends but you don’t want to be still complaining weeks later. Good friends can help you point out the positives and take you out. You don’t want to scare away a potential date complaining about the ex. This is similar to the rule of job hunting where it is advised to say nothing negative about a former employer.
Candy’s Classy Breakup Tip #4: Count Your Blessings
There are so many positive things going on in my life. When I think of all the good things I have hope. I am humbled and grateful. These positive feeling push down any negative thoughts. Relationship ends for a reason that often results in our growth.
Candy’s Classy Breakup Tip #5: Seek Counseling
There is no shame in seeking out help if you feel depression is disrupting your life. The end of a relationship can be very traumatic for some people and it is important to seek counseling if the behavior is detrimental to you overall help.
I hope these tips help you get over a break up fast. Would love to hear your tips on how you get over a breakup.